Concerning Historical Causation

Many people wonder how we got to the advanced state of hurly burly, hustle bustle filled with moral perils like teenage pregnancies, rampant drug use, and Sarah Palin in which we now find ourselves.  I don't claim to be scientist type with a white smock, slide rule, and pocket protector, although I do have thick glasses.  I do claim to be familiar with arguments about historical causation; I would like to make one that I know beyond all shadow of a reasonable doubt because of its dense facticity and iron clad logical rigor to be 1000% unassailably wrong but which involves bikes of two sorts. First an edenic trip down memory's lane:

Second, a hellish trip down memory's lane involving internal combustion engines and a portable tv here .  If you scroll all the way down you can watch at least part of the documentary under consideration.

I think, subject to the caveat in the first paragraph, that it is clearly a matter of historical fact that internal combustion engines and portable tvs led to the hubbub and jostle infected world of today with its moral perils of moderate centrist presidents, universal health care, and the ever-larger looming threat of Mitt Romney or worse yet Tim Pawlenty, and we must conclude that if more people went for bicycle rides the world would be a better and happier place.