Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Who's Zooming Who? Or, Rather, Whom.

Via Think Progress we learn of the Tea Party Patriots notion of legitimate political questions. Although personally fond of question 2, which argues that God alone ought regulate the carbon in our atmosphere, I want to highlight number 15, which asks candidates to agree, disagree, etc with the statement
I advocated moving our currency to a debt-free supply-side labor-based currency.
Uh, er, um.  What the etc?  So is this an admission that the Tea Party Patriots, of Ohio in any event, actually think that
on the back of your Social Security card, there's a number. That number indicates the bank that bought you when you were born based on a projection of your life's earnings, and you are collateral.
And want to transfer a baby's lifetime earnings from the banks to the Federal government?  In which case, aren't they endorsing slavery? The worst kind of slavery: government mandated slavery. And even worse, what if the next generation of babies decide that they want Wiis before they can afford them and all take out Walmart credit cards to get the Wiis they needs and, as a result, their lifetime earnings are plunged into debt and, consequently, the debt free aspect of the labor-based currency is rendered nonexistent and we fall into a new dark ages. And, if you think about it, wouldn't the Illuminati, whose name suggests they glow, be the ones most likely to endorse a policy designed to recreate an era in which light was either missing or very expensive, given that they could rent themselves out for, say, office parties or as street lamps.  If that is true, and defy you to say it isn't, then aren't the Tea Party Patriots, at least of Ohio, tools of the Illuminati?  And if they are tools of the Illuminati and their leader is Glenn Beck, then isn't he, in fact, the Antichrist?  And if he is, in fact, the Antichrist and, as we all know, the Antichrist is the current president of these United States, shouldn't Beck be getting the blame for our recent economic unpleasantness? Who does Glenn Beck blame for the recent and current economic unpleasantness and the future enslavement of all mankind?  The President of these United States, that's who.  However, as I have just shown, irrefutably because as of right this second no one has refuted it, Glenn Beck is both the leader of the Illuminati, the Antichrist, and the President of these United States, long may they wave, and an advocate of slavery.  Glenn Beck is responsible for the very problems he warns us about.  Talk about the long con.

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